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Ok, I think this is the last card for awhile.

Last weekend, I had the opportunity to attend a high school Christian conference with one of my high schoolers.  Normally, these conferences are held in the San Bernardino mountains.  This time, they decided to do something different and they held all the conferences locally, which meant that we were in Anaheim for the weekend.  Since we were in a large, urban area, everyone was housed with nearby families as opposed to individual cabins.

Well, this presented me with an interesting challenge.  When a family allows me to stay at their home for a little bit, I feel that I should present them with some kind of gift as a gesture of appreciation, because…I appreciate it.  They don’t have to house me for a weekend, or whatever period of time.  They probably have other, more interesting things to do than to house me or others.  It’s very nice of them to do so.  But in this case, they volunteered their house for the purpose of housing a bunch of high school girls and accompanying counselors, so I felt that giving a grandiose gift would be out of place.  What to do?

TADA!  A homemade card that has lots of open space for us to write something we enjoyed from the conference.  And that’s what I did.

The template is from Creative Pop Up Cards, another good source of interesting cards.  He even provides video tutorials.  I used golden yellow and seafoam green cardstock for the card.  It was a color palette born out of poor planning.  The the bright yellow worked out really well, actually.  It meant that the card was hard to miss and our host family is sure to see it.  Huzzah!

If you do, maybe you should first consider:

  • how you would brush your hair.  I doubt that stabbing your eyes with a comb or brush is pleasant.
  • how you would sleep.  You would no longer be able to sleep on your back.  Well, you could but only if you turned your head to the side.  I don’t really find that comfortable, but maybe you do. The whole situation just seems to be rife with opportunities to smash your eyes against the pillow though.  You should probably just sleep on your side for the rest of your life.
  • how you would have to drastically change your hairstyle.  This isn’t a problem if you’re bald or even if you had a buzz cut, but what if you have longer hair?  You’d have to try and see through your hair all the time.  You might think that you do ok now when your hair is in your face, but that’s not really the same as having hair growing out all around your eyes and you have to see through it.  It’s like if your eyelashes and eyebrows became suddenly, freakishly thick and long and you had to see through it all the time.  You’d have to shave at least the area around your eyes.  The hair on the top of your head could be parted to the side, I guess.  Probably would be safer just to shave the top of your head too.
  • how you would protect your eyes from dandruff.  It might cause eye infections.  What if you got pinkeye?  Your eyes would be all weepy and gross and it’d be getting into your hair and creating a big mess.
  • how you would wash your hair.  With your eyes in the middle of your hair like that, you’re bound to get shampoo in them all the time.  You might say that you can tilt your head forward instead, but then you’d be getting shampoo in your other set of eyes.
  • how you’d deal with the need for corrective glasses.  Ideally, you would have perfect vision, but really…how often does that happen?  So many people need corrective lenses and you probably will too.  So, your ears are facing forward and it would be hard to hook glasses onto them.  Also, you have no nose in the back of your head, so you can’t rest the glasses there for stability.  What if you need glasses for your forward facing eyes?  How would you manage two sets of glasses?  You might try wearing contacts, but then your arms don’t bend too well in that direction.  You’d probably just poke your eye out trying to put contacts into your backward facing eyes.  And what about sunglasses?  I don’t even know about those.  I guess people would have to wear something like a sweatband but with lenses built into both sides and you’d have to wear them low over your face.  Doesn’t sound that comfortable to me.
  • how you would apply makeup or eye creams or whatever.  I know a lot of people really dislike wrinkles around the eye area.  I would only assume that this would apply to all eye areas.  I think you’ll poke an eye out trying to put on makeup and such to your backward facing eyes.

I’m not trying to actively discourage you from getting eyes on the back of your head.  I just want to make sure that you’ve thought everything through.  I firmly believe that people should make informed choices.  Nod.