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Tag Archives: work

Superpower: Talking to you at the most inconvenient time to inconvenience you further

You might not think that’s a good superpower, but it actually is. If you’re a supervillain that is. And in your supervillainy ways, you’ve been made at least middle management. Preferably middle management. And your dastardly plan involves slowly destroying the morale of your employees while extracting ever more work out of them. And if one of your employees is a superhero in disguise, all the better.

Still don’t believe it’s a good superpower to have if you’re a villain? It’s true, this superpower isn’t very flashy and might not be very good in a fist fight, but if you want a long lasting career as a supervillain, you have to be subtle and you have to plan.

Think of how easily supervillains crash and burn. Actually, not just supervillains. Think about how easily mere villains crash and burn. How many of them even make it to the super status? Sure, you’ll have the plucky villains who resolutely make new plans each time their originals were dashed, but they’re basically treading water. You can’t hope to achieve fame and recognition if you’re always treading water.

And that in itself is a problem. Supervillains make themselves too vulnerable when they’re widely recognized. They’re basically a beacon to every passing superhero to come and knock them out. True supervillains have to be crafty and subtle. Hence, the middle management. They’re there to make you miserable. You, the optomistic, cheerful, spunky superhero that you are. Or the normal worker drone. Whatever. Supervillains probably are not picky about to whom they spread misery.

Think about how quickly a supervillain in middle management can upend your day when they appear out of nowhere right as you were going to go on a coffee break, or lunch break, or leave for the day, and start a long and involved discussion about something work related. And somehow, before you even realize it, you’re saddled with more work, half of which is busy work but absolutely essential to the success of the project. It will probably require days more work with overtime (which you will not be paid for because you are a salaried worker drone).

Supervillain.

Superpower.

Safe travels?

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Hey Boris.  I’m really sorry.  I never thought you would be kidnapped.  Guitar-napped?  I guess the proper term really would be “stolen.”  It’s been a month.  I think I should just accept it now.

But I really didn’t think it would happen.  I mean, you were always safely ensconced in your case when you weren’t with me.  And more often than not, you’d be in the trunk.

Yes, Puddul’s trunk may not have been the absolutely best housing. The massive swing in temperature really isn’t good for any instrument, but you took it in stride.  I didn’t detect any warping.  And there was such a nice space for you at the bottom of the cage.  Really, it was the perfect fit.  And you didn’t even mind when Yaris would try to use your case as a step stool.

And you sounded good in Puddul’s interior.  You kept me from going insane in the middle of the work day.  It helped knowing that if I needed to, I could spend some time with you during lunch.  And…now I can’t.  And the kids don’t have any accompaniment anymore either.  It’s going to be tough times ahead.  The blue shell is still around, but I can’t carry the blue shell around with me everywhere.  He’s much too big.

I really hope whoever kidnapped you has realized that you’re a really good companion.  Hopefully you’re travelling the world now and seeing new sights and experiencing new things and delighting kids in different parts of the world with your funny shape but great portability and nice action and warm tone in a small, enclosed space.

Hope you have a nice life, Boris.