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I recently donated blood to the Red Cross, which is run by vampires, in case you were not already aware of that fact.  The humanitarian things that the Red Cross does is just a front to keep people from finding out that its really run by vampires.

Anyway, I recently supported vampire hibernation.  I have never done so before.  I don’t really know why.  Maybe because I always thought I was anemic, or close to it, and needed every red blood cell to keep me functional.  Or something.  I do things for very obscure reasons sometimes.

One of these obscure reasons for supporting vampire hibernation was that I have been quite curious about my blood type.  I never knew what my blood type was and apparently neither did my parents.  I guess I would have found out sooner if I needed a blood transfusion or something, but I never have needed one.  I have led a terribly blood transfunsionless life.  I suppose the vampires are happier because of it.  I’m not constantly trying to dip into their stores of blood.

ANYHOO!  My donor card arrived recently and I have found out that I am an AB+ (two links).  This probably means the Red Cross will never want my blood again.  “But why?” you ask.  Well, apparently you weren’t paying attention in high school biology, otherwise you’d know that people who have blood type AB+ do not have the anti-A or anti-B antibodies in their plasma and they have the Rhesus factor on the surface of their red blood cells.  This in turn means that they are the “universal recipient” as they can receive blood transfusions from all blood types.  That also means that only others who are AB+ can accept type AB+ blood…so, demand is rather low.  The Red Cross probably does not want any more of my blood.

Well, the vampires might want my blood, but since they’re putting up a humanitarian front, they probably won’t be accepting any more of my blood.  Otherwise how can they explain that blood disappearing when relatively few humans can accept that type of blood?  Nope.

BUT, the Red Cross might want my plasma.  Remember how I said that there are no anti-A or anti-B antibodies in my plasma?  That means all other blood types can accept plasma from an AB person (the Rh factor doesn’t really mean much in this case because there are no red blood cells).  That means that perhaps the Red Cross will ask for my plasma instead of my blood.  Which brings me to the question, what do vampires want with plasma?  I always thought vampires wanted whole blood.  Maybe dieting vampires drink only plasma.  Makes sense, right?


One Comment

  1. If I remember correctly from the instructional videos “True Blood”, you stay the way you are once you are ‘turned’. So no amount of dieting will change vampire body shape. It’s a conundrum. Make further enquiries.

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